Advice: Unexpected but Well-Received

The pastor had no idea how an unspoken gesture of advice would affect his ministry. As Sunday night services ended, five men walked to a small room behind the sanctuary of the white-frame church. They sat around the children’s Sunday School table. No one expected the undeserved tongue lashing awaiting them. Deacons’ meetings in the country church usually passed quickly with minimal discussion. But not that night.

Unexpected Judgment

When the meeting neared completion, Clint decided the time had come to tell the other deacons what he thought of their deacon service. The short, white-headed, modern-day Pharisee unleashed a verbal assault on “the lethargic witness and complacent attitudes” of the sheepherder and cattle farmers. Clint made his living in the city and did not have to worry about taking care of animals. The other men, excluding the pastor, had been up since four a.m. because they had to tend their animals before Sunday Services. Nevertheless, Clint’s critical monologue seemed to carry on endlessly. 

Unspoken Advice

The young pastor in his first church had never heard such venom, at least not on the church grounds. He squirmed in his seat. Then, as he prepared to rebut Clint’s comments, he felt a knee hit him. Thinking Jerry, the man on his right, was stretching his legs, the pastor moved his legs to give the deacon more room. Not thirty seconds later, he felt that knee hit his leg again.

He turned to his right and looked straight into Jerry’s piercing eyes. The preacher couldn’t miss Jerry’s right index finger resting across his lips as he shook his head from side to side. Clint didn’t notice the body language as he spewed his judgment. The pastor furrowed his head and mouthed, “But.” Jerry shook his head in a universal expression meaning “No,” never allowing his finger to move away from his mouth. Not a word came from Jerry’s mouth, but the advice was clear.

Unknown History

After about thirty minutes, Clint tired of his ugly tirade. No one responded, and the meeting adjourned with prayer. Clint left the room first, giving no one a chance to speak to him. The pastor felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to Jerry, who whispered, “You did real good, Pastor.” The pastor said, “But that was wrong.” Before he could say anymore, Jerry leaned in close to say, “We’ve heard it all before. That’s how he sets up the young pastors. He’s run off several of our pastors by getting them to say something they shouldn’t. Don’t worry about it.”

Unruffled Advice

Years later, a wise deacon passed along the same advice to the now older pastor, only this time he spoke his wisdom. “Act, don’t react.” Nothing stands alone. Words and actions ride on facts and feelings, both seen and unseen. So do reactions. And the reactions do not always hear or see the complete picture. Be wise. Anticipate at least one more fact awaiting discovery. 

Those deacons refused to let the littleness of the smallest man in the room chip away at their stature. The advice of Jesus transformed their reactions. “Turn the other cheek.” Jesus did not differentiate whether attacks arrived with words or fists (Matthew 5:39). The men lived in the same community, shopped at the same store, and were determined to exercise Christlikeness with their abrasive brother. They refused to let Clint’s sharp words pierce their hearts. Instead, they remembered who they were in Christ and acted according to his way. 

The men who knew Clint would address his objectionable behavior, determining the right time, way, and person to express what they needed to communicate. But they chose to do nothing without first praying for peace in their hearts and wisdom for their approach.